LOVE, PROVIDE, PROTECT; CHILDREN DESERVE THIS!!!
I must issue a forewarning that this material will probably have some controversial undertones.
I was reading a story on Medium this morning which spoke about interracial dating, in particular the subject was dating between Black women and White men. It was an interesting synopsis of what the author felt was the agenda associated with this pairing.
As I read the comments that were the subject of the conversation, I was inspired by one that stood out to me. It was from a gentleman using the moniker Optikool. (I hope that he will not be offended, or disturbed by me mentioning his name, or his post) He made a positive comment about story, stating that he and his spouse were an interracial couple. The thing that struck me was that he praised his two biracial daughters and said that they were beautiful and unique. Is this not the kind of support and encouragement that all daughters and sons for that matter want and deserve?
This brings me to the controversial parts of the conversation. I recently read that a petition was made on Change.Org to have Will and Jada Smith banned from speaking about their personal life so heavily on all media types. I don’t know if this was a joke or not, but people were saying that they know more about the couple than they would have ever wanted to know.
Well, I petition to bring back “shame” to our society. Not body shaming, or shaming based on race, gender, who you choose to love, or any other quality that should solely be based on individual choices. This shame would be based on the fact that we have chosen to not be the best humans that we can be. We are as a collective seem to be stuck on stupid when it comes to being decent human beings. We just can’t get past go!
Brene’ Brown is one of my favorite people. In my mind we’re friends. She is fabulous at what she does. She has a PhD, and is an author, a professor, clinical social worker, and a researcher in the field of studying, courage, empathy, vulnerability, and shame. She lectures and does tours teaching people how to overcome the obstacles of the above-mentioned topics. I am not sure that she would be pleased with my petition; but hear me out.
Our society today sees no issues with doing anything and everything with no fear of consequences, or repercussions. We live in a world where anything goes! As scripture states we have come to be past all moral sense. It don’t make no sense; and we ain’t got no sense! There was a time when “shame” was a somewhat positive attribute. Being a Black kid growing up in the South it was understood that by no stretch of the imagination were we to embarrass our parents in a public setting. There would definitely be a price to pay if we did. Most of us got good grades and did our best so as not to bring shame upon them. We were polite and kind for this same reason. Girls (and I did say girls, not adults) didn’t go all the way for fear of getting caught or getting caught up. Boys often cared for and didn’t want to cause this type of issue for someone they cared about. In essence, we all cared.
Today is a totally different story. The headlines have been recently filled with unconscionable tales of people with no shame. Stories of people who most assuredly should have never been parents in the first place.
The most recent act was the school shooting in Michigan. The parents of this child (James and Jennifer Crumbley) allegedly often left him home alone at night at a young age supposedly to go bar hopping. A neighbor made an anonymous call to child services to report him not being supervised. They knew because he would come to their home when the parents would leave him. This child would later at the age of fifteen plan and carry out a school shooting that killed four of his classmates and injured several others. He was given a nine-millimeter automatic handgun as an early Christmas present. The child was seen during class searching online for ammunition for the weapon prior to the shooting. When the mother was told that the child was seeking to buy ammunition she allegedly stated. “LOL, I’m not mad at you, you just have to learn not to get caught.” The parents were made aware that this child had a propensity towards violence. His teacher let them know that he was drawing violent artwork at school. Is this a gift that you should/would give to a child without all of these predisposing factors let alone one with unstable mental health?
The second case is one that is so heinous that even Stephen King would have a hard time writing the plot. Gloria Y. Williams left her three children aged fifteen, nine, and seven in an apartment alone with no food and with the corpse of her fourth child aged eight. The child was allegedly murdered by her boyfriend and left in the home. Williams supposedly checked on them every two weeks. She is currently in custody along with the boyfriend Brian W. Coulter. The siblings survived, but how they will fare with this kind of mental and emotional trauma to deal with is yet to be seen.
The last episode of this trilogy is the tale of a female high school student who slapped a teacher while she was using a corded phone that was on her desk during school. The student followed the slap with a barrage of profanity, and racial insults. The student is White, and the teacher is Black. As the teacher veered toward the exit of the classroom the female student called her mother on the phone to request to be picked up from school. Allegedly the mother claims prior to this assault that she had asked for help from the school for her daughter. The student is allegedly autistic.
These are just three of the plethora of examples of individuals and administrations who have no shame, show no common decency, and feel that they bear no responsibility for the mayhem that they have caused in these children’s lives. I realize how difficult parenting is as I have children of my own, and of course I have made mistakes for which I bear shame and a modicum of regret. But this way of thinking that we have the right to be this selfish, unloving, and just plain cruel when we bring children into being has got to stop! To say that these children were dealt a tragic and gross disservice is definitely an understatement!
I look forward to a time when we all will protect our children, praise our children, love our children, and give them the fighting chance that they deserve, as I hope and believe the father that I mentioned at the beginning of this article is doing.
Our children should be our most prized possessions!
